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Tag Archives: humor

Lazy Democrats, go out and vote!

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Hey, Democrats! Don’t be lazy, go out and vote! The Republicans vote. That’s why we end up with a bunch of lunatic monsters like Donald “why can’t we use nukes” Trump, Mike Pence, Sarah Palin, Ted Cruz, Rick Santorum, and various other assorted nuts.

So sorry that you can’t vote on your smartphones. I wish we could, not for me, but for you lazy Democrats! Make a sacrifice this November, skip your latte frappuccino macchiato supercalifragilisticexpialidocious with room for cream, and your butternut squash chocolate chip croissant. Take a bottle of water and a banana, get some fresh air, and get in line to vote!

And don’t just vote for President you lazy Democrats. This isn’t a dictatorship. You need to vote for Senators, House Representatives, Governor, Mayor, meter maids, etc. But wait there’s more! Every 2 years there are also elections for Senators, House Representatives, Governor, Mayor, meter maids, etc.

Go vote every 2 years you lazy Democrats, so we don’t continue this rollercoaster of majority Democrats one year, then majority Republicans 2 years later, then back and forth every 2 years.

Republicans are against government. Remember, government is Of the people, By the people, and For the people. So if you’re against the government, then you’re against the people and our Democracy. And if we vote for the right people, who knows, maybe one day we will be able to vote on our smartphones, or the chip in our brain.

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Cow doesn’t want to give milk.

Updated on

Most people assume that milking a cow is a relaxing thing. But imagine if the cow resists. Chasing the cow across the field, tackling it down to the dewy grass, trying to squirt some milk into a glass bottle while the cow struggles. Just a thought.

Hey, maybe this could be a Geico commercial: “You’re a rebel cow. Unlike other cows, you resist and struggle in giving up your milk. It’s what you do.”

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