Hey, ‪‎Citizens‬ United!‬

1. Corporations are not people! They don’t even have any DNA! So, corporations are neither people, or animals, or vegetables.

2. Money is not free speech! Just like apples are not free speech, neither are cats, mountains, tires, pancakes, and… Continue reading

Man get swallowed alive by whale.

If a man get swallowed alive by a whale, and nobody can hear him, will a tree fall on him?

Beer Battered Fish

Question: When making beer battered fish, do you use a full beer bottle or an empty one?

What’s your name?

He: “I’m Druff. Daniel Druff.” Me: “May I call you Dan… “He: “No.”

Religion, it’s not Rocket Science.

MMJ Card?

He: “Yay! I just got my medical marijuana card!”
Me: “What happened? Did you get a paper cut, or did someone hurt your feelings on Facebook?”

Brutally honest?

A friend says to me: “May I be brutally honest with you?”
I say: “Sure.”
Then he beats me up.

Another friend says to me: “May I be brutally frank with you?”
I say: “Sure.”
Then he beats me up… Continue reading

Why did the mime fall off the cliff?

Because someone told him to think outside the box.

April Fools Day!

Today is NOT April Fools Day.
Just kidding, yes it is. Got ya!
Got your nose, too, and threw it into the garbage disposal!
April Fools, again!

Coming up!

Showing page 1 of 4 Next

  • Sunday Funnies at Kawika’s Ocean Beach Deli!
    June 26, 2016
    Kawika's Ocean Beach Deli
    San Francisco

  • Road to the Funny Fest 2016 Comedy Competition!
    June 27, 2016
    San Francisco

  • Radio Ha Ha
    June 30, 2016
    Worldwide Podcast

See all shows >>

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