When I was a kid we didn’t have braces. We just got a punch in the face. I got adjustments every two weeks.
Was so excited that Amazon convention was coming to San Francisco, but later disappointed that it was Amazon.com
Darn, I was really hoping to meet Wonder Woman!
Recipes probably created by a guy:
Customer: “Excuse me, Chef. But this pasta is not completely cooked.”
Chef: “Oh, it’s fine, it’s Al dente!”
Customer: “Excuse me, Chef. But this soup is totally cold.”
Chef: “Oh, it’s fine, it’s… Continue reading
I propose a new Proposition to increase the alphabet to 38 letters so that there can be more Propositions.
Traditionally on Thanksgiving, the President pardons a turkey.
If Donald Trump becomes President, he will pardon a pumpkin.
Hey Citizens! Are you against new music, smartphones, call-waiting, hipsters, marijuana, granola, reality shows, and tired of those two other political parties?
Then join the Get Off My Lawn party, and vote for me for President!
It’s spice pumpkin season again! Everything is going orange, like coffee, pastries, pancakes, etc.
At a NYC Starbucks, an employee accidentally grabbed Donald Trump’s head, and almost shoved it into the blender!