You are here: Funny
On the bus for long ride, I ask driver if there’s a movie.
“Yes, it’s a silent movie, filmed in black. Now sit down!”
Found a farm-to-table restaurant, where the honey is so fresh…”How fresh is it?”Honey is so fresh, that they make the bees vomit into a jar, right in front of you.
If I win the lottery, first thing I’d do is buy the San Francisco 49ers, and move them…15 inches to the left.
In my day, we used to text people with a typewriter.
Boss: “Why are you late?”
Me: “My neighbor ate the rooster.”
Beginning in June, the FDA updated the 5 second rule to 33 seconds.
You’re welcome.
Thanks to 23andMe, I found out that I’m 78% Kermit The Frog.
Which explains my voice.
Remember, you can always end any conversation by simply saying:
“Because that’s how I roll, baby.”