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Most people assume that milking a cow is a relaxing thing. But imagine if the cow resists. Chasing the cow across the field, tackling it down to the dewy grass, trying to squirt some milk into a glass bottle while the cow struggles. Just a thought.
Hey, maybe this could be a Geico commercial: “You’re a rebel cow. Unlike other cows, you resist and struggle in giving up your milk. It’s what you do.”
When I was a kid, they told us that in the future, we would have flying cars.
But instead, we got this:
Ordering sandwich at the deli:
Me: “What is corned beef?”
Deli-meister: “It’s a beef that has been cured.”
Me: “Cured?!”
Deli-meister: “Yes, for example, today’s beef was suffering from chicken-pox. After 2 weeks of rest, it is now cured. We also have a special pastrami that was suffering from a broken leg. It should be fully recovered and ready by tomorrow.”
Me: “Hmm…”
Deli-meister: “Next week we have a very special pastrami that should be fully recovered from malaria.”
Me: “I think I’ll have the salad.”
I order 6 coffees at Starbucks, one after the other.
I like hearing someone call out my name.
Hi Conan,
Are you going to have another Conan O’Brien look-alike contest? I’m Danny Dechi, and everywhere I go, people think I’m Conan O’Brien. I’m tired of being stopped by people and explaining to them that I’m not you! You’ll notice that my pictures on the Internet look exactly like you, but they’re actual photographs of me!
I was wondering if I can be on your show while wearing a red tie, then we can stand side by side, and then show people that whenever they see me, they can tell that I’m not Conan O’Brien because I’m wearing a red tie, which means you can never wear a red tie. So, what do you think?
Danny Dechi