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Caveman on stage, with microphone off to the side. Yells to the caveman audience:
“Sorry folks. The show will get started as soon as somebody invents electricity.”
If an astronaut is floating out in space, and no one is there to hear, will a tree fall on him?
– Remember when nobody wanted to ride in a station wagon?
– But, my car is not a station wagon. It’s a CRV, or STD.
– Does your car have a trunk?
– No.
– Does your car have a door in the back?
– Yes.
– Then it’s a station wagon!
Today is NOT April Fools Day.
Just kidding, yes it is. Got ya!
Got your nose, too, and threw it into the garbage disposal!
April Fools, again!
The City has equipped public buses with Artificial Intelligence.
The bus I rode on, broke down…and cried.
Hey pot smokers, who carelessly stink up our city and reek on the buses.
How would you like it if, wherever you go, there’d be someone that trips you over and then farts in your face?!
Here’s a preview of my new Silent Movie: The Invisible Man Meets The Invisible Woman:
It’s freezing here, in San Francisco!
It never was this cold when Willie Brown was Mayor.
I’m tired of being a super hero. It’s time for somebody else to take over. So, I wrote Shazam on my Starbucks cup.