You are here: Funny
When I was a kid, they told us that in the future, we would have flying cars.
But instead, we got this:
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Ordering sandwich at the deli:
Me: “What is corned beef?”
Deli-meister: “It’s a beef that has been cured.”
Me: “Cured?!”
Deli-meister: “Yes, for example, today’s beef was suffering from chicken-pox. After 2 weeks of rest, it is now cured. We also have a special pastrami that was suffering from a broken leg. It should be fully recovered and ready by tomorrow.”
Me: “Hmm…”
Deli-meister: “Next week we have a very special pastrami that should be fully recovered from malaria.”
Me: “I think I’ll have the salad.”
Hi Conan,
Are you going to have another Conan O’Brien look-alike contest? I’m Danny Dechi, and everywhere I go, people think I’m Conan O’Brien. I’m tired of being stopped by people and explaining to them that I’m not you! You’ll notice that my pictures on the Internet look exactly like you, but they’re actual photographs of me!
I was wondering if I can be on your show while wearing a red tie, then we can stand side by side, and then show people that whenever they see me, they can tell that I’m not Conan O’Brien because I’m wearing a red tie, which means you can never wear a red tie. So, what do you think?
Danny Dechi
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New video game called “Call of Dooty”.
Rated “I” for Immature.
Katy Perry in the Super Bowl halftime show?! It’s a football game! It’s not a place for little girls music! The Super Bowl is a place where tough men play, a field where bones may break, and blood will spill. At least get some real women who rock, like Pat Benatar, or Joan Jett, or Twisted Sister! But Katy Perry?! That’s like putting a merry-go-round on a pirate ship! Or a boxer raising his hand during the middle of the fight to be excused so that he can take a wee wee in the little boys room.
Year after year it’s the same thing with this little girls music. Who are you aiming for in the ratings, men, or all those Oprahs out there? C’mon NFL! Be a man. Don’t turn the Super Bowl into a Martha Stewart show!
Is Katy Perry popular just because she sang some lame song “I kissed a girl”? Who didn’t kiss a girl, except for those sissys who planned the Super Bowl halftime show!
This is the kind of music that should be on a halftime show: Twisted Sister
not this: Katy Perry
By the way hopscotch fans, here’s the original “I kissed a girl” – Original: I kissed a girl
Booya!
Theory of Everything
The only science I learned from that movie is that all men are pigs.
Jaws
I didn’t see that movie, because people should know that they shouldn’t be going in the water when there are sharks there. For example, what if there’s a movie called “House on fire”. Why would you want to watch a bunch of stupid people running into a burning house?
Y tu Mama Tambien
People do things. I get it.
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