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PA at Movie Theater

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Public Announcement at movie theater:

“Our theater manager is sad because her cat died.

So we ask you for not just a moment of silence, but silence for 2 hours and 11 minutes. Thank you.”

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Anti-Social Security

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Every year that you behave like a jerk, you can pay into Anti-Social Security, in addition to regular Social Security.

That way, when you retire, you’ll receive additional pay.

You’re welcome.