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Yoko Ono sings?! The horror! The horror!

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The horror! The horror! While listening to this, my cat committed suicide, and my dog bit me! I can’t call her a bad singer, because she doesn’t even qualify as a singer! She sounds like a horrible hurricane!
I can’t believe that a human being can be worse than bagpipes!
You shouldn’t forward this link to anyone! It can be harmful to children! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfZvHuh7wKM

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Friday the 13th Coffee

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I normally drink decaf. For some reason today, I tried caffeinated coffee. I was climbing the walls, literally! People at the office were yelling at me to get down from the ceiling. I yelled back: “I don’t want to get down! I’m Spiderman!”

They got my sister to call me all the way from Israel to talk me down. She reminded me that I like Batman, not Spiderman. Eventually, someone threw a bottle of water to me, I drank it down, feel better, but there’s a feeling of awkwardness now at the office. Happy Friday the 13th. Don’t do drugs.

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I’m still at Candlestick Park!

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CandlestickParkLast GameHere’s me. 3 days after the last game ever at Candlestick Park, with the security guard still trying to pull me out of the stadium.
My arms are getting weary. Can someone please bring me some spinach, and maybe a cup of water?
So who’s with me? Who wants to join me, and show those greedy owners who the real 49ers fans are?
Stay 49ers! Stay 49ers! Stay 49ers!
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Dr. Phil Movie

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I had a dream last night. I’m on the set for the upcoming movie about Dr. Phil. My role is playing one of Dr. Phil’s patients. I quietly sit face-to-face with the great Dr. Phil while he lectures me.

I think I need a stuntman.

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Candlestick Park seagulls

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Right around 4PM when the 49ERS football game is about over, seagulls at Candlestick Park know it’s time to flock the stands to gather food left over by the fans. Due to the York family, who owns the 49ERS, and is moving the team to Santa Clara, the environmental impact if Candlestick Park is demolished, will be seagulls, including baby seagulls, will starve to death. The York family will have thousands of seagulls on their head!

If you want to know what I think of the new stadium, read this: Taking it in the End Zone

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