Funny

Hear Astronaut

If an astronaut is floating out in space, and no one is there to hear, will a tree fall on him?

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Remember when nobody wanted to ride in a station wagon?

– Remember when nobody wanted to ride in a station wagon?
– But, my car is not a station wagon. It’s a CRV, or STD.
– Does your car have a trunk?
– No.
– Does your car have a… Continue reading

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Buses with Artificial Intelligence

The City has equipped public buses with Artificial Intelligence.
The bus I rode on, broke down…and cried.

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Smart Car

Does spitting on a Smart Car count as a car wash?
Asking for a friend who was recently fired from a car wash.

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Preview of my new Silent Movie

Here’s a preview of my new Silent Movie: The Invisible Man Meets The Invisible Woman:

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It’s freezing!

It’s freezing here, in San Francisco!
It never was this cold when Willie Brown was Mayor.

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Tired of being a super hero

I’m tired of being a super hero. It’s time for somebody else to take over. So, I wrote Shazam on my Starbucks cup.

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Trying to be a nice guy

Trying to be a nice guy today, I told a woman she has some schmutz on her forehead. She yells: “You are the Devil! The Devil!”

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Husband and Wife

Husband: “I wear the pants in this family!”
Wife: “And I pull them down!”
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Cream?

Customer screams at the top of their lungs at a coffee shop.
Barista clarifies: “I said room for cream? Not scream.”

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Coming up!

Showing page 1 of 4 Next

  • 2019 Funny Fest Tuesdays!
    April 23, 2019
    Neck Of The Woods
    San Francisco

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  • Radio Ha Ha
    April 25, 2019
    FCC Free Radio
    Worldwide Podcast

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  • Sunday Funnies at Kawika’s Ocean Beach Deli!
    April 28, 2019
    Kawika's Ocean Beach Deli
    San Francisco

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(Says Danny's Girlfriend)

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