Funny

I’m surprised that bacon hasn’t become a currency yet.

Happy Holidays!

It’s that time of the year, people.
Someone tried to steal my package, and I got a groin pull!

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Something stinks

If somebody has garlic breath…oh, that’s bad!
But if some pot smoker’s breath smells like they just licked an angry skunk’s ass…that’s fine?

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Kermit the Frog…

Kermit the Frog revealed today, his results from AncestryDNA:
22% = ping pong ball
44% = pool table
34% = Gumby

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Did you hear about…

Did you hear about the ghost who committed suicide?
They donated his body to séance.

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The day after Halloween

Telling people today:
“Dude, Halloween is over.”

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Why they call it World Series

Some people complain why do they call it World Series, when it’s only played in the U.S..
Well, what about the Ms.Universe pageant?

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Contestant at The Gong Show

The Saber Dance Song plays while he gulps down a tall glass of milk.
Contestant: “Ta da!”
Judges: “So you drank a glass of milk. What’s the big deal?”
Contestant: “I’m lactose intolerant.”
Judges: “Security!”

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Who’s on first?

The Cleveland Indians were here before the Minnesota Vikings.

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Too much PC

Everything is so PC nowadays. I remember before it was shortened, the old saying was:
“Don’t cry over spilled milk, or I’ll punch you in the face.”

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Coming up!

Showing page 1 of 4 Next

  • Stand-up Comedy Showcase with Danny Dechi & Friends at Neck Of The Woods!
    December 12, 2017
    Neck Of The Woods
    San Francisco

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  • Radio Ha Ha
    December 14, 2017
    FCC Free Radio
    Worldwide Podcast

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  • 7th Annual Cobb’s Holiday Comedy Bash!
    December 17, 2017
    Cobb's Comedy Club
    San Francisco

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(Says Danny's Girlfriend)

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